I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
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