Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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