so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
