I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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