While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
