At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
