life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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