I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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