Define "chronic" masturbator.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
