Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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