I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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