First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
