im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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