we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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