But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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