TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
It's blow job season.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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