Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
