The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
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Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
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FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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