Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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