i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
