I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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