Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE