even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
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