In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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