yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I am one with the molecules
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
