No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Randomize
