Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense