I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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