I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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