Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
