i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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