the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
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She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
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Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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