if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
