It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
