Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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