I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
