Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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