if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
