Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...

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  (804): Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon... http://tfl.nu/v4as
  Replies (5) Good night (1069) Bad night (544)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.

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  (253): I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy. http://tfl.nu/efip
  Replies (12) Good night (1020) Bad night (3188)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things

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  (847): We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things http://tfl.nu/jwjz
  Replies (7) Good night (3349) Bad night (1021)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.

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  (586): there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control. http://tfl.nu/uxm4
  Replies (13) Good night (1705) Bad night (3720)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...

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  (631): Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again... http://tfl.nu/fuha
  Replies (13) Good night (7545) Bad night (1099)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.

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  (513): sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things. http://tfl.nu/e6ox
  Replies (36) Good night (9401) Bad night (1220)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.

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  (515): Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him. http://tfl.nu/tve9
  Replies (14) Good night (5747) Bad night (1419)
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  (707): View more from California

  I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor

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  (707): I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor http://tfl.nu/hlsl
  Replies (11) Good night (4639) Bad night (986)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.

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  (817): I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut. http://tfl.nu/n51l
  Replies (14) Good night (2914) Bad night (1217)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on

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  (540): i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on http://tfl.nu/ddt2
  Replies (1) Good night (1320) Bad night (645)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.

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  (480): You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home. (602): Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul. http://tfl.nu/qvbw
  Replies (10) Good night (2770) Bad night (764)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?

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  (361): Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive? http://tfl.nu/y06z
  Replies (5) Good night (1844) Bad night (850)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.

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  (214): ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room. http://tfl.nu/r3lr
  Replies (11) Good night (498) Bad night (1286)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart

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  (630): Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart http://tfl.nu/qpzs
  Replies (8) Good night (591) Bad night (1440)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Do one night stands count towards my number?

  (516): View more from New York

  Yes. A penis is a penis

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Even bad ones?

  (516): View more from New York

  YES.

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  (217): Do one night stands count towards my number? (516): Yes. A penis is a penis (217): Even bad ones? (516): YES. http://tfl.nu/iyle
  Replies (0) Good night (641) Bad night (393)

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