Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
