As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
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