I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize