Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
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