Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
