I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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