There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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