the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Too much gin, very little bucket
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Randomize
