Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize