go do what you do best...puke behind churches
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize