You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
